Dave Chappelle is one of the greatest comedians of all time, because he makes ministerial and racist comedy done right. In fact, I love his Comedy Central show, Chappelle's Show. His black riffages and African-American satire are chaotic and intelligent. However, there is a lost Halloween special of the Chappelle's Show that was never aired. Season 3 was supposed to air in 2005, but since he was unhappy with working with the show, he moved to Africa. However, he has since restarted his comedy career; and still funny as is; but the episode I'm about to discuss- it will shiver down your pancreas. Viewer discretion is advised... I mean, ADVISED.
Ladies and gentlemen, I want everyone to know that I work at a Randolph's Taco Shop. I had an angry boss yelling at me, mainly because I made the tacos a little disheveled. One day, I had fixed the Doritos and Mountain Dew tacos, until I found under the oven something horrifying... and what could lead to the theories of the end of the world come true. I found a VHS tape of the Lost Episode of the Chappelle's Show. Knowing that I am a fan of said Chappelle's Show, I risked get fired, so I left work early, ran close by to my $90,000 month apartment. I did everything I could. Yep yep. As I put the tape on in the VCR, I got excited. I've been a fan of the Chappelle's Show since it aired on Comedy Central. But this tape was different.
The episode began with a horrifying sketch featuring Dave Chappelle in a black and white photograph, screaming his lungs out. This reminded me of the movie, The Seventh Seal, only a lot, LOT more morbid and delusional. This went on for at least a fraction of 30 seconds before we cut to the stage of where Chappelle performs. This was very, VERY fucked up.
The live studio audience appeared to be dogs barking, throwing bones on stage. Chappelle came up to the stage, as he looked a little more angry than usual. He introduces himself, but interrupts himself with a monologue about a fat Axl Rose, and how he threatened to sue Google for these images. Then, we cut to the next skit.
The next skit was about Charlie Murphy (Eddie Murphy's brother) talking to Dave Chappelle in a white hair metal band, and there were racist jokes, here and there, some good tasteless jokes. But the next part crawled my spine like a Little Caesars stomach ache. Dave Chappelle brutally beat the shit out of Charlie in the most realistic way possible, and this wasn't scripted either! He said, "I'm not working with you anymore! Fuck that shit! Fuck Comedy Central!" He ripped up his shirt, he beat up the cameras, everything! All this while people were humming the Chappelle's Show theme song.
The final skit was the worst part of them all... Dave Chappelle was seen working for the free mason. He used three shapes to form triangles and conduct a speech about how racism is still going and how Black Lives Matter doesn't matter. Then the tape stopped. No music video, nothing. It just ends.
I ejected the tape, feeling worried about the world itself! Is this a prank? ...Or is this for real? ...Am I dead inside?
I heard a knock on my window. Dave Chappelle was outside. "I see you've been watching my show, bitch!" said Dave Chappelle. I was scared. I tried to contact the police or hug my teddy bear, Chesterton... but Dave Chappelle came in ruined my couch, by screaming that he was Rick James... then he used triangles to cut off my hand.
Kids, the moral of the story is... don't use crack. It can kill you.