CJayMarch Wiki
Advertisement

Me

Created/Written by Boltgon, TailsDoller2 and Devonte

Animaniacs Ü (aka Animaniacs Vs. Mighty Ü)

Sup, reader who decided to read this spooky story.

My name Is Walter Wolf, and I'm Slappy Squirrel's archenemy. I fucking hate that fucker! I wish I never met that fucker, my life would be better without her.

Oops! Sorry about curssing.

I used to work as a higher-up and editor at Warner Brothers, located on Burbank, California back in 1993 for the show "Animaniacs". The reason why I bring this up is because of a scrapped episode that I will never forget. You see, we hired a man named James, who wanted to create a special of the show that would give a memorable ending to it. He spent days in his own room working on the special by himself, every time we tried to communicate with him, he would tell us to get out. He was really weird.

After a lot of countless days and hard work, James said to us that the special was now complete. He finished it in 1998, the year the show was cancelled. He gave us a VHS tape with a label saying "Animaniacs: Episode Ü".

Brain, Yakko, Dot, Wakko and Pinky (left to right)

I honestly felt strange that he didn't asked for help. He didn't even accepted help. To be honest, he really seemed that he wasn't a veteran at this area, and since I was involved in the storyboards, it would be really hard for him. We honestly should have hired a more experienced person, rather than a random fan of Warner Bros. I mean, it was the finale, so everyone who worked and was involved with the creation of the show should have took part on it. Not to mention that James seemed scared for some reason, and he didn't even explained us. Some of us were worried, because he might had created something that would put Warner Bros into bankrumpcy.

Also this was the last time working for them, because my contract ended that day.

I went home and prepared some carbonara pasta to eat while watching the episode.

I then put the tape in my player.

The tape began with the normal intro. After the intro ended, it went into the title card which had Yakko with an evil expression on his face and the text above him read “Ü"

The episode began with a shot of the WB watertower. It then cut to a shot of Yakko and Dot inside. Yakko was listening to the radio, while Dot was on a laptop. A news reporter then said on the radio "Breaking news. A local Ü has been set by two mice. Please evacuate the area with caution OH SH-" Yakko laughed and said "Good one!" and Dot said "Good one what?". Yakko said "Pinky and the Brain have set a fucking local Ü!". Dot said "That’s not a joke." and Yakko said "WHAT THE FUCK?"

Suddenly, Mighty the fucking Armadillo appeared out of fucking nowhere.

”YO WHATUP JIMSHITS?!” Mighty screamed.

Yakko then pulled out a fucking knife and started stabbing Mighty The Armadillo in the chest, as Mighty was screaming in pain because of the stabs and died.

But even that couldn't prepare me for what came next.

Mighty just fucking came back to life.

He then took out a fuckin’ rocket launcher and blasted Yakko and Dot with it.

We then see Mighty sitting on a couch on his phone broadcasting Yakko’s freak out.

“That guy’s a jackass. Especially with his siblings.” Mighty said as he was eating a burger.

Suddenly, Yakko held Mighty and told him "Shut the fuck up bitch." Yakko then threw Mighty off the window and splattered bones, organs and blood across the floor.

Wakko yelled "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MIGHTY, YAKKO?!".

Mighty came back to life again and threw a bomb at the Warners, causing them to die. He then kept eating like none of that ever happened.

A Rita and Runt segment then came on, which was weird because Rita and Runt segments were discontinued at the end of season 1.

It showed Rita and Runt fighting for about 27 seconds before Runt began growling as he whipped out a yo-yo and choked Rita with it. He then started screaming but it wasn't cartoon-like at all, it was like the voice actor was acting fuckin' insane, and said "FUCK YEAH!"

We see Dot at MrBeast Burger.

Say fucking what? She was killed by Mighty! How the fuck was she alive?

She threw a tantrum because she lost all her lives playing SteamWorld Dig 2 on her New Nintendo 3DS XL.

First off, MrBeast Burger was founded in winter 2020, and second, New Nintendo Fucking 3DS XL was released in 2015! Trust me, I know.

Dot then apologized to everyone for her attitude.

As if on cue, Wakko BURST from a window and said:

"HOW THE FUCK ARE WE STILL ALIVE!? WE JUST GOT KILLED BY THAT RED GUY!"

It then went back to the episode with Yakko at a safety shelter with helicopters there. Yakko then went up to one of the helicopters. As Yakko got on the helicopter, it immediately took off. We couldn't see who was really flying the helicopter because the camera was mostly focused on Yakko.

"I've killed my fucking brother and sister, now it's my turn to die." Yakko said as he jumped out of the helicopter and fell. He then landed on the ground dying instantly with all of his limbs broken as it showed a graphically-detailed sequence of Yakko's corpse burning.

After 10 seconds of Yakko's corpse burning, he fucking moved.

Why couldn't he just fuckin' die already?

He went to Romania and started blasting the Thomas the Tank Engine theme through a boombox at max volume, disrupting the citzens. That was honestly a rude thing to do. Listen everyone, I love Romania so much and I mean it. So do not say that I'm lying okay readers?

Suddenly, Wakko and Dot appeared and slapped him, telling what he did was wrong.

Yakko apologized for his crimes.

Then Tex the robot from fucking THX appeared out of nowhere, and he whipped his fuckin' chainsaw.

“Awww, yeah! This is where the playtime starts!” Tex said.

Mighty appeared again with explosives and said “GET BOOMMMMBBBED!” and he blew up Tex.

Tex The THX Robot Fucking Dies.

Suddenly, fucking Bomberman appeared, and stole his bombs, proceding to run away.

"Hey! Give me that shit back!" Mighty said, giving chase to him.

Mighty eventually got the explosives back.

“Yeah, I would go on how you won’t beat me, but I don’t have enough time.” he said.

Then an army of Mighties BURSTED out of nowhere.

Mighty then got a yellow whistle and blew into it as Ray the fucking Squirrel appeared out of a puff of yellow smoke.

"Hello, mothafuckas!" he said, with a fuckin' kid’s voice.

”Ray, bomb them.” said Mighty.

Ray then blew up Yakko and his brothers, but it turned out they were plush versions of them, as the real Yakko, Wakko and Dot escaped in a car.

Yakko was driving the car, which was weird, because HE DOESN'T OWN A DRIVER'S LICENSE!

The screen went black, and it showed...

NO, NOT HER AGAIN! ENOUGH NO!

We see Slappy fucking Squirrel appearing out of nowhere, but she looked fuckin' REALISTIC. She didn't have a hat, she was NO longer an elder grouchy veteran and with an umbrella, and she stared at my soul, with bloody red eyes.

After a few seconds she started dancing Home Resonance.

She then ran into the screen and began banging it with her head, trying to break it.

I shat myself upon this. She seemed that she wanted me dead. I tried to get out of the room, but the doors were closed. Upon touching the doorknob, it burned my hand.

She managed to break out of the TV, hurting herself with glass, and began walking at me.

I was ready to die when Sid the Squid barraged from the wall, riding a car and rolling Slappy over.

"Sid? How did you knew this would happen?" I asked him.

"There's not time for explanations, we need to get outta this country forever!" Beanie the Brain- Dead Bison said, coming out of a window.

"But what about my house?" I said.

"We can fix that" said a blue robot named Doraemon.

We got outside and Doraemon pulled out a flashlight, which used it on my house. Then, he fucking exploded it.

"ARE YOU FUCKING OUT OF YOUR MIND? NOW I'M HOMELESS!" I screamed at Doraemon.

"Hey, we can fix it later. We have to move to another country." Doraemon said.

We got into the car and drove through the city, but suddenly the car started making some noises. Sid tried to stop it, but he couldn't.

The car started fucking laughing, and it turned out Slappy possesed it.

"YOU FUCKERS WILL DIE!" she said, appearing in front of us as a ghost and throwing everyone out of the car, only leaving me on it.

We started fighting, as she drove the car with her newfound possesion powers to a mountain.

"YOU RUINED MY LIFE! NOW I WILL TAKE YOURS!" she said... crying?

I was shocked. I never saw her in this state. For the first time in my life, I wanted to save her...

"This is gonna be crazy, but it has to work" I said to myself, launching at her and..

Hugging her.

"What the hell are you doing, jerk?" she said, crying.

"Finding my heart" I told her.

I kept hugging her tight untill she calmed down and stopped the car before it could fall off a cliff.

We then got back to civilization and found the gang in our way. I explained them that both of us changed ways.

I was angry at James. He probably organized all of this.

I convinced my higher ups to confront him.

We went to his house, breaking down the room, and we heard something at his room.

When we opened it, I saw something terryfing.

There were Minerva Mink merchandise everywhere: toys, plushies, posters, you name it.

And James was praying at a Minerva poster.

"Fuckin' hell, you weren't supposed to survive" he said.

"Explain us" I demanded.

He revealed his name was actually Roffer Valiskivitz, he came from Ukrania, and he dedicate to the creation of infamous parodies of cartoons that faked them to make them look real and selled them to his victims. He also was into alchemy and dark magic, enchanting his tapes with demons that would kill the people who made them. At a beggining he used them only for "population control" but when he discovered Animaniacs, he became obseesed with Minerva, at the point of using the bodies of the victims as sacrifices to make her real. Unfortunately, Slappy came across his way, but he killed her and her nephew, trapping their souls in the tapes of the infamous Animaniacs Ü tapes, which created to get his final victims for the ritual.

"Ok, you cannot be alive anymore" I told him, and everyone agreeded with this.

I pulled out a knife and barraged at Roffer with it when instantly the lights went out and he knocked all of us down.

We woke up, but he was gone.

Later, Doraemon was able to revive the victims of the tape, as well as Slappy and her nephew.

Now, James, or should I say, Roffer's location was uknown...

But we are safe now...

...Right?

(continuation of this story in Phineas And Ferb Lost Series Finale)

Advertisement